For as benevolent and giving as the medical path can seem, it can seem pretty damn selfish, too. (I partially base this notion on a speech from a 5th year, just to give credit where it’s due.) We’re hit with the firehose of medical knowledge when we can only sip, and we pass on our frustration and grief to our friends and loved ones. When we need them most–for support, love, and sometimes, just an ear. And at the same time, we can’t always give that level of support back.

We give up our future 8 years (“the best years of your life!”), lose touch with close friends, maim relationships and love, go into great debt, put our lives and health at risk, lose sleep, and stress and question ourselves. And all of this under the assumption that we’ll enjoy this “practicing medicine” thing for the rest of our lives. I don’t care how much you’ve shadowed doctors, how many offices or clinics you’ve worked in–there’s no proof that we’ll enjoy this line of work. Matriculation rates are pretty high across the country, so I guess the system’s picking a decent crop of people, but it’s really quite a lot to give up.

“Short term” pain; “long term” gain. I just hope I don’t come out of this regretting that I let someone important in my life slip away, or that I didn’t enjoy the ride, or that I missed out on some sort of generational experience because I was busy in the lab.

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